Shooting Flowers, Romping through Hills & Questions about Focus

In the world of digital everything, Google and YouTube bloggers, writers and anyone who calls themselves a content producer learns how to create stuff to read, headlines, outlines, lists and other things to attract attention. It's not a bad thing; we just end up with lots of 11 ways to do this or "the one mistake to avoid this" kind of things.  I'm just as guilty of this.  Lists are a great way for me as a writer to organize, sort and make sure what I'm writing a)makes sense and b) is actually a smidgen helpful.

This doesn't have anything to do with the topic of today though.  I want to talk about focus.  As in, if I see another "7 ways to stay focused" I think I'll skip it.  (and if I've written any of these, my apologies).  I had a lesson in focus this past weekend.

I went up to Apple Hill, one of my very favorite autumn haunts.  I love to go with people but I really dearly love to go there all by myself at least once every year.  Even though there are people around, there is enough nature and trees and rolling, winding roads to feel as if I'm really "out there."

I took my camera and I snapped away, taking pictures of colorful leaves, bins of apples, lots of funny shaped squash.  They were very ordinary autumn joys but there isi something about ordinary joys that steal my breath away sometimes.  It's fun to romp through hills with well worn tennis shoes under tries that look they are on fire with color. Often it is finding the ordinary joys in the everyday seasons that help me find a sense of peace in the middle of a lot of questions and chaos and noise.

I was shooting some wild flowers in between an apple orchard and a vineyard.  Well, o.k. they weren't wildflowers, maybe they were just weeds. They were pretty to me, caught my eye and I wanted to capture them.

I snapped a picture.

Then I shot another picture. Another. Another.

The darn flowers wouldn't stand still!  Or was it my fingers?  Grandpa used to tell me I held the camera like a gun- the whole camera shakes when I shot the picture, making the image shake and blur.  Honestly, I've tried to work on that, but I think my grip still needs a little loosening.

It wasn't just my grip though.  The wind was up and the flowers were whipped around.  The lens of the camera was trying to help me focus but when the flowers were blowing they would focus on something else. Then I realized my shadow was overshadowing the flowers, blocking the light and creating funny dark spots in the picture.

And all this made me think about focus and how stinking hard it is.

We tend to think that focus is all about what we are doing but that just isn't true.  There are a lot of factors affecting our ability to focus.

We are definitely the major player when it comes to our own lives.  I'm the one holding the camera.  Where I stand, the angle I shoot at, how my fingers hit the button, this is all my doing.  How long I'm willing to wait and be patient until the wind slows down is my decision.

But there are other factors that affect my focus like.....

The actual focus point can be a problem.  Ever notice how our goals, dreams, relationships don't stay still? what's up with all the wiggling?  I desperately wanted a beautiful shot but the flowers were seriously not cooperating. It's not that different from our goals.  We may know what we want (a crisp shot of a wildflower against a blurred background) but the process of the how is another story.

I was part of an online course by Kelly Rae with lots of different artists all trying to learn how to apply what Kelly Rae knew to their own business. Most of the participants wanted to grow their blog and business and make money from their art. The process of becoming a working artists is challenging.  We all had the same goal but most of us didn't come out of the class making lots of money with our art.  The "how" to get to the end result is fuzzy and takes time.

The materials we use can present challenges.   Including the hands we work with.  My ability to create the work I want to falls short on a regular basis. What I want to create and write doesn't usually come to fruition. The words fumble, the paint blurs, the collage doesn't turn out.

As if all of these things weren't enough, outside problems and situations can interfere with focus. It can be a good distraction- a wedding, growing children, Christmas (woohoo!) or it can be not-so-good things: sickness, family crisis, strained relationships, job frustrations, financial problems.  Sometimes no matter how much we try to focus on "it" the thing we are trying to get done, our focus keeps shifting up to the external situation.

After saying all this you would think I have some sort of solution.

But I don't.

I've lived enough life to figure out that problems come and go and come again.   I'm not where I want to be but I'm not  where I was. So trying to eliminate all the external problems is not the answer. Something is always brewing.

I'm like you, continuing hard after dreams and an authentic way of living, battling discouragement and frustration and my own limitations when it comes to focus.

The only thing I can think of is to keep going.  Accept the bad days and do a little joy dance for the good days.

The best thing to do is to not let the lack of focus frustrate us to the point of stopping.  I do believe that when we reach an impasse, when we really feel like giving up, that is the point of a breakthrough of some sort.  just like muscles scream at us when we push a little pass our limit, our brains, bodies and hearts scream when we are pushing to a new level.  I'm convinced of this.

Maybe I needed to say this for myself or maybe there is someone else who needs to hear it too. Don't be so hard on yourself.  If you are progressing steadily it means you are steadily making progress!

Don't grow weary in doing good for in due season you will reap a harvest , if you don't give up.   (from Galatians 6 Don't get weary in doing the good work.  The harvest only comes to people who don't give up.)